Killer Crocodile

Killer Crocodile

Genre: Horror, Giant Monster, Adventure

Original title: Killer crocodile - Coccodrillo assassino

Director: Fabrizio De Angelis

Year: 1989

A group of environmentalists arrives at a faraway tropical delta where toxic waste is being dumped. However the water also hides a giant crocodile. The corrupt local officials don't help much either.

This creature-feature is directed by Fabrizio De Angelis who's best known for being producer on some of Lucio Fulci's most famous films such as Zombie, The Boyond & The New York Ripper. Under the pseudonym of Larry Ludman he'd direct a string of mostly forgotten about genre films around the mid 80s such as Karate Warrior & Thunder. 

So here we have another Jaws style cash-in done with little money & little talent. yet Killer Crocodile still manages to generate a certain amount of charm to make things worthwhile. The acting & editing are pretty terrible at the best of times but the Crocodile effects are actually pretty damn solid. They do make the big mistake of revealing too much of their giant prop by not cutting away fast enough which gives away any faults, but for a picture like this it was actually impressive.

The plot, whilst predictable moves along at a decent pace & remains semi entertaining. The cast lack personality and mostly just act as fodder for our big croc with exception of Ennio Girolami who plays this complete badass who lives near the swamp so understands the terrain & most importantly, looks like Lee Van Cleef! The environmentalists seek help & turn to him so Girolami casually jumps off his boat & lands on top of the Croc and begins to attack the beast, it's hilarious in its outrageousness & easily the best scene in the entire picture.  Sadly Girolami passed away earlier this year.  Ennio made a number of appearances in cult Italian films from Light Blast, to Tenebre & also was in all three films of the Bronx Warriors trilogy which were directed by his younger brother Enzo G. Castellari.  

You know what you are getting yourself into with these type of pictures, most of them are pretty atrocious & whilst this picture suffers from some terrible writing, bad acting & a complete lack of originality it remains mildly entertaining throughout & lovers of creature-features will no doubt get their kicks out of it.

Rating: ★★½

Ennio Girolami 1935-2013. R.I.P

Light Blast

Light Blast

Genre: Action

Original title: Colpi di luce 

AKA: Laser Killer

Director: Enzo G. Castellari

Year: 1985

A crazed physician invents a death ray and threatens to destroy San Francisco unless he is paid $10 million.

The opening scene of two lovers meeting up in an abandoned factory soundtracked by an enormous cheesy power-ballad whilst incredibly tacky opening credits are plastered onto the screen perfectly sums up what you are getting yourself into for the next 90 minutes. They are soon melted to death via the death ray by the crazy scientist played by character actor Ennio Girolami. It looks like the end of Raiders Of The Lost Ark yet made with no budget on an Atari ST. This first few moments are essentially a make or break moment for the viewer, either you will be completely turned off by its ineptness or you will be rubbing your hands with glee in excitement for the next 80+ minutes. Thankfully I was the later.

Light Blast stars Erik Estrada best known for the T.V series CHiPs. Whilst his build & height are both way too on the small side to be playing an action star he remains charming throughout & it's easy for the viewer to get on his side. The first time we see Estrada he is being sent with a plate full of food to give to a gang of terrorists who have taken over a building with hostages to boot, this whilst in his pants!. He hides a gun inside a turkey and blows away the bad guys, completely bad ass. 

Elsewhere there are plenty of goofy characters, 80s gadgets (which are hilarious to look back on) & one of those synth heavy scores with electronic drums & funky bass lines which just brings an instant smile to my face. But lets face it, you only watch a flick like Light Blast for the action & my god does it deliver.  

Having already directed the Bronx Warriors trilogy Enzo G. Castellari was no stranger to B-movie style action films & here he delivers arguably his best action film. Only for a brief 15 minute spell around the half-way mark does the film ever let up on its electrifying pace. The rest of the film feels like when you get bored playing Grand Theft Auto and just decide to blow up everything in sight. The film provides constant thrills via car chases, gun fights & repeats this again and again. There's also footage of a demolition derby thrown in as if there wasn't enough carnage already! Its one of those films where you have to sit back and really appreciate the fact that some crazy mother fucker risked his life time & time again to pull off some of the insane shit that we see on screen & there's plenty of occasions where the stunts look damn right dangerous! One being a man being hit by a car which is in the process of exploding at the exact same time!

We get Estrada stealing a buggy-car and chasing the mad scientist through the San Francisco hills in a thrilling last few minutes, the buggy-car spends half the time in the air & with the synth score blasting out it really is an awesome few minutes.

Light Blast remains one of those action films which barely has a plot and is almost always clunky in its delivery, yet with its none stop action it is the kind of film that you can stick on & (excuse the pun) have a complete blast with each time. 

Rating: ★★★½

Just one of several thousand explosions you'll see during Light Blast.